How to sleep with a snoring partner: what actually helps
Fall asleep first, mask the snoring with low brown or pink noise, try earplugs or sleep buds. In one study, partners woke briefly 21 times an hour.
- What helps tonight: fall asleep before your partner, wear earplugs or sleep buds, and play a steady, low noise to cover the snoring.
- Why it is so tiring: in a 1999 study of 10 couples, the partners of snorers with suspected sleep apnoea woke briefly a median of 21 times an hour.
- Why masking works: a 2005 sleep study found that the jump from background sound to peak, not the peak itself, decided whether a noise woke people, and steady white noise shrank that jump.
- Which noise: snoring is a low, rumbling sound, so a deeper noise like brown or pink often covers it at a lower volume than the hiss of white noise.
- When to see a doctor: if the snoring is loud and comes with pauses in breathing, gasping or choking, the person who snores should talk to a doctor.
Shimmr Binaural beats for meditation, sleep and focus Get Shimmr How to sleep with a snoring partner comes down to three things: fall asleep first, cover the sound, and make room to sleep apart when you need to. You cannot stop someone else’s snoring tonight, but you can make it much easier to sleep through. Here is what helps, why it works, and when the snoring is worth a doctor’s visit.
How do you sleep with a snoring partner?
The simplest plan is to fall asleep before your partner does, then block or mask the snoring. Snoring is hardest to ignore while you are still awake and waiting for the next one. Once you are deeply asleep, it takes more to wake you.
A plan for tonight:
- Go to bed a little earlier. Even 20 minutes ahead gives you a head start.
- Wear earplugs. Foam earplugs cut a lot of sound if you roll them thin and let them expand fully in your ear.
- Add a steady noise. Play low brown or pink noise from your phone, a speaker or sleep buds.
- Ask your partner to sleep on their side. Many people snore less on their side than on their back. A pillow behind their back can help them stay there.
- Have a plan B. Agree in advance that either of you can move to another room without it being a big deal.
Why does a snoring partner keep waking you up?
Snoring wakes you because it keeps changing: a quiet breath, then a loud snore, then silence. Each change is a new sound for your brain to notice, even when you do not fully wake up.
A 1999 study measured this in 10 married couples. One partner in each couple snored and was being tested for sleep apnoea, a condition where breathing keeps stopping during sleep. Both partners slept in the lab at the same time. Halfway through the night, the snorers were given a CPAP mask, a machine that keeps the airway open with gentle air pressure, which stopped the snoring.
The results for the partners who did not snore:
| Before | After the snoring stopped | |
|---|---|---|
| Brief arousals per hour | 21 | 12 |
| Time in bed spent asleep | 74% | 87% |
The authors worked out that this was about 62 extra minutes of sleep a night. So if you feel worn out, it is not in your head: the snoring really is breaking up your sleep.
What noise is best for blocking snoring?
A steady, deep noise such as brown or pink noise usually covers snoring best. This is called masking: a constant sound fills the quiet between snores, so each snore stands out less.
A 2005 sleep study showed how this works. It was very small, only five people, who slept with recorded hospital noise. The noise raised their arousals from 13.3 to 48.4 an hour. When white noise was added under it, arousals dropped back to 15.7 an hour. What decided whether people woke was the jump from background to peak, not how loud the peak was.
Snoring is a low, rumbling sound. White noise has a lot of high hiss, so it can take more volume to cover a snore. Brown and pink noise put more of their energy into low sounds, so they often mask snoring at a lower, more comfortable volume. Our guide to brown noise vs white noise explains the difference.
Be honest with yourself about the evidence, though. A 2021 review of 38 studies rated the evidence that continuous noise improves sleep as very low quality. Noise is a tool for covering sounds, not a sleep cure.
Do earplugs or headphones work better for snoring?
Earplugs and noise work best together. Earplugs lower the volume of everything, but a loud snore can still get through. Noise fills the gap.
| Option | Good for | Watch out for |
|---|---|---|
| Foam earplugs | Simple, silent, no device | Loud snores can still get through |
| Noise on a speaker | No earplugs in your ears | Your partner hears it too |
| Sleep buds or soft headphones | Masking right at your ear | Keep the volume low |
With anything in or on your ears, keep the volume at no more than 60% of maximum, the limit the WHO suggests for safe listening. More tips on volume and timers are in sleeping with white noise.
Is it normal to sleep in separate rooms because of snoring?
Yes. Plenty of couples sleep apart on some or all nights because of snoring, and some call it a sleep divorce. It is a practical choice, not a judgement on the relationship.
Some couples start the night together and one moves later. Others sleep apart only on work nights. If you both sleep better, you will probably be better company in the day.
When should a snorer see a doctor?
The person who snores should talk to a doctor if the snoring is loud and comes with pauses in breathing, gasping or choking, or if they feel very sleepy in the day. These can be signs of sleep apnoea. As a partner, you are often the first to notice, so it is worth mentioning gently. In the 1999 study, treating the snorer also helped the partner sleep.
While you wait, the steps above still help. In Shimmr, you can start Awake → Asleep before your partner comes to bed, layer brown or pink noise under it in the mixer, and let the sleep timer fade everything out once you are asleep.
Common questions
How can I sleep next to someone who snores?
Try to fall asleep first, then cover the snoring with earplugs, sleep buds or a steady low noise. Ask your partner to sleep on their side, since many people snore less that way than on their back.
What noise is best for blocking snoring?
A steady, deep noise such as brown or pink noise usually works best, because snoring is a low sound. Keep it as quiet as possible while it still covers the snores, and use a timer that fades it out.
Do earplugs or headphones work better for snoring?
Earplugs muffle sound but a loud snore can still get through. Sleep buds or soft headphones playing low noise add masking on top, so they often work better; keep the volume at no more than 60% of maximum.
Is it normal to sleep in separate rooms because of snoring?
Yes, many couples do it, and some call it a sleep divorce. Sleeping apart on some nights is a practical choice, not a sign that something is wrong with the relationship.
When is snoring a sign of something serious?
Loud snoring with pauses in breathing, gasping or choking, or strong sleepiness in the day can be signs of sleep apnoea. The person who snores should talk to a doctor.
From Gareth, who makes Shimmr This article is for general information and is not medical advice. Binaural beats are not a treatment for insomnia or any other condition.